Kim Crayton ~ Her/She

University of Michigan research confirms what many Black Americans have lived: white Americans, despite being the physically healthiest group, are the least resilient. White men experience the fewest stressful life events of any group and yet each one hits them harder. The explanation from the researchers is direct. They are less prepared because they have less experience.

That lack of preparation is not neutral. It has consequences for everyone around them.

This is why I don't debate that ALL whiteness is racist.

All I need to know is are you a racist who's leaning away from the myth of white supremacy by actively developing a consistent, demonstrated antiracist practice OR are you leaning into the myth by operating as a full on white supremacist.

That's it. It's just that simple.

#LifeBeyondTheSupremacyMyth #MythOfWhiteSupremacy #ProfitWithoutOppression #KimCrayton

I just realized something about white folx and their attachment to the word “ally.”

For many, “ally” is shorthand for “not racist.”

It’s how whiteness signals its values, how you prove to yourself and others that you’re a “good” white person. The problem is that this framing strips away the very foundation of whiteness, racism itself, allowing you to position yourself as hero or victim, but never the villain.

I’ve been watching videos of a single, older white woman living on a narrowboat, cruising the canals and rivers of the United Kingdom. I’m drawn to this content for two reasons: curiosity about the lived experiences of others, and because, as someone determined to make choices my ancestors and elders were denied, I’m planning my own “woman of a certain age” solo adventure.

I’m choosing to age in a place where growing older isn’t treated like a looming crisis.

Welcome to the 8th day of “Facilitated Conversations with Kim Crayton: I Want To Speak To White Women Directly,” and 2nd of a 3 part series “In Conversation with White Women” [2.16.2026]
Assignment:

1. View video https://youtu.be/Ub0G5gK8ogg

2. Share this content with other white women

3. Answer the following prompts as comments below:

White folx often talk about wanting to “unlearn” racism.

But too often, that’s framed like a curriculum. A set of knowledge and skills you acquire until you eventually graduate.

That framing is a trap.

Because it positions racism as something external to you.

Something you picked up.

Something you can set down.

There are moments in this work where the most loving thing you can do feels like the hardest thing you’ll ever have to do.

This morning, I had to tell someone that I cannot be the person they rely on.

Not because I lack compassion.
Not because I don’t see their struggle.
Not because I’m indifferent to their pain.

But because I have done too much work to build a life rooted in boundaries, peace, and clarity to abandon them now.

What are we doing?

People around the world are combing through millions of documents tied to an international child-abuse network, and still, this will not be the moment many white folx recognize how the myth of white supremacy poisons everyone it touches, including you.

Even as I write this, I know this will cross the timeline of white folx who will publicly deny what history and present-day evidence make painfully clear.

You cannot ask for tenderness without recognizing who has been denied it for generations. White women, this moment is not asking you to feel guilty. It is asking you to understand that the “robbery” you feel is the removal of a protection that was never equally distributed. To recognize that many non-white women have been mothering under crisis, surveillance, economic instability, medical neglect, and state violence for a very long time.

What became undeniably clear to me, week after week, was this: white men are harmed by the very systems, institutions, and policies designed to benefit them. Not in the same ways as non-white people. But in ways that stunt their emotional development, limit their capacity for connection, and trap them inside a rigid, fear-based identity that requires constant performance and denial. And that’s when it fully clicked: