Lesbian Death Bed

1
Joss Whedon: greetings whedonistas and whedonistos!
Clive Barker: who're you?
Whedon: i'm
Whedon: i'm joss whedon!
Whedon: c'mon, you remember me!
Whedon: i was everyone's woke 90s bae!

1
Luc Besson: submitted for the approval of the midnight society, i call this the tale of incel dracula
Besson: so dracula goes to a party, but a courtesan laughs at him!
Besson: like, she doesn't even care about his amazing perfume or his $500 gucci sunglasses
Besson: fuckin' femoid!!!

1
[circle of love]
Nora Roberts: ok ladies we've got a new storyteller here tonight
Roberts: everyone say hi to Coral hart
Coral Hart: oh that's not my real name
Hart: i have to keep my real name secret because readers hate anything its associated with
Roberts:

1
King: submitted for the approval of the midnight society, i call this the tale of the
Elon Musk [rising from bushes] eyyyy stephano king
King: what are you doing here
King: you know, we haven't really talked in years
King: do you just come here whenever you're mentioned in the news?
Musk: si!

1 [white house] Trump: so we're bombing venezuela now Trump: no reason, really, just because Trump: we just had all these bombs lying around Trump: and we thought Trump: why not JD Vance: masterful gambit, sir