I self published a book on Amazon. Once Amazon took their cut of the sales, I earned the princely sum of £2.78 which helped me put another wing on the east part of the mansion. To rub salt into the wounds of all those who paid hard earned money for it, I have now removed the book from sale on Amazon and published it on my website where anyone can now read it, if they want to, free of charge, gratis, no moolah required. It’s in its original state before Amazon’s censorship software forced me to remove all the swearing which, in my opinion, definitely took something away from the dialogue as I had to come up with non-sweary words, phrases and insults etc. and most of that just sounded stupid. Also, universe. I’m so sorry. I know it was pants. It is far from my best work. It is silly, stupid and has no real plot. It’s basically just a collection of ridiculous jokes and running gags. The truth of the matter is I wrote that story straight off the top of my head, in a few hours a day over the course of about a week. I had no idea of the plot and just made it up as I went along. It was written for a bit of a laugh in the first place and was never meant to be published. It was only meant for the eyes of the real people the characters are (very loosely) based on. I spent more time designing the cover than I did writing the book. So why did I publish it? Amazon launched a competition for new authors and I published that steaming pile of shit for entry into that competition. I knew it stood little chance of winning, but even a tiny fraction of a chance is better than no chance at all. You see, I am a world class procrastinator and I get distracted very easily. I have ideas, start writing and then get distracted by a shiny, new idea and start working on that. That stupid story is the only one I ever finished. But it might give someone with the same infantile sense of humour I have a bit of a giggle. https://corvusnet.co.uk/making-waves/ #humor #humour #funny #stupid #freeread