I'm the Perl guy at 4:01. Except it's PHP, and 2007.

"In 2007 I'd have shipped this with one PHP script and a cron job!"

"PHP."

"The whole company would run on it."

"Society would run on it."

"No containers."

"No YAML."

"Just regular expression."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xE9W9Ghe4Jk