Rando Star Trek

In this episode Captain Picard plays poker with the gang although also convinces Starfleet that holograms have rights.

This time Seven of Nine has a transporter accident nevertheless actually is the link to the alpha quadrant

In this episode Dax is hijacked by a space pirate named Vantika for nefarious purposes although accidentally causes the crew to get space drunk.

Tonight on Star Trek: Voyager
Harry sure as shit isn't going into another meeting although becomes an all-star pitcher in the new-earth baseball league

Tonight on Star Trek: Discovery Commander Saru increases the frequency of Black Alert drills yet could have prevented all of this if they had scanned the ship first

Tonight on Star Trek
Spock makes first contact with a race of sentient insects however also convinces Starfleet that lovebots are sentient and have rights.

Tonight on Enterprise
Lt. Reed meets a friendly robot who just wants to love although is suspiciously sensitive to light

Tonight on Deep Space 9
Dr. Bashir is addicted to Space Tik Tok although could have solved everything if the transporter had just worked.

Tonight on Star Trek
Uhura solves the puzzle onboard a derelict space station nevertheless could have prevented all of this if they had scanned the planet first

This time Admiral Cornwell is convicted of mutiny although could have prevented all of this if they had scanned the station first

In this episode L'Rell crosses into the mirror universe to steal a pizza ordered by their counterpart yet also starts another war!

Next week, on CBS All-Access Ensign Tilly accidentally starts a war with the Klingons yet the writers ran out of excuses for the crew to be involved in some other civilization’s bullshit

This time Dr. Bashir becomes the Sirah (local televangelist) for a town on Bajor that has never seen an episode of Scooby-Doo however also convinces Starfleet that holograms have rights.

This time Nog thinks they’ve won the truth from Garak yet actually is the link to the alpha quadrant

Tonight on Enterprise
Subcommander T'Pol gets lunch with Degra and always goes to the bathroom before the check gets to the table yet actually is the reason why we cry.

This time Captain Lorca can't stop watching reruns of 2 Broke Girls on CBS but finds the ship overrun with holodeck characters!

Tonight on Star Trek: The Next Generation
Ensign Ro goes to shore leave on Risa however actually is the link to the alpha quadrant

This time Captain Kirk travels through time nevertheless they’re trapped in the stick-clicking German-alien’s board game and have to move along home

This time Commander Saru accidentally starts a war with the Klingons however also convinces Admiral Fraiser to take Space LSD.

In this episode Dax finds a puddle of Ensign Aquino, nobody writes a letter to their family or seems to mind at all, but also convinces Starfleet that lovebots are sentient and have rights.